Roadblock Blog

The GOP, now that this year’s session is in full swing, has really geared up their roadblockin’ ways. Yesterday, it was blocking much needed economic stimulus because it actually helped veterans and seniors! Don’t y’all get it? It’s only economic stimulus if it stimulates the bank accounts of friends of Mitch McConnell.

Pauline Kael is often quoted as saying, “I don’t know how Nixon won; none of my friends voted for him.” Well, the mantra of the Roadblock Republicans is, “I don’t think this helps anyone; none of my friends will get money from it.”

And St. John of McCain, patron saint of DC-based pundits, noted Straight Talker and Maverick, who has been strutting about the country touting how important economic stimulus was … how did he vote? [John McCain impression] Well, my friends, I’m sorry to tell you, my friends, but the picture isn’t pretty. He didn’t vote, my friends. [/end John McCain impression].

Yes, you heard that right, in another Profile in Courage moment for the most disingenuous Republican candidate in memory, John McCain actually skipped this vote. He was more interested in campaigning than he was in actually, oh, doing something for the American people. Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama were there in voting, and they have a hot primary still going on. McCain is the clear front-runner, but he couldn’t even be bothered to vote.

Which is, of course, nothing new. Last year, McCain voted in only 58.7% of the votes. The only Senator who was worse was in the hospital with a brain hemorrhage. Yes, unless you’ve had a brain hemorrhage and are in critical care, you would be a better Senator than John McCain. Pitiful.

{more inside … }

I’m sorry, but you’re all going to die. The GOP has said that the wiretapping provisions are the Most Important Thing Evah when it comes to stopping the terrists. So it’s really necessary to pass the new FISA bill. But they won’t pass the bill unless it gives the President everything he wants. Which the Democrats don’t want to do because what the President wants is just … not good. So, in short, the GOP in the Senate is going to stop the Most Important Thing Evah because the President won’t get what he wants, including immunity from lawsuits for Verizon.

Verizon lawsuits=bad. All of us dying=less bad.

Roadblocking, roadblocking, roadblocking. That’s what they do. That’s all they do.

Now, of course, we’re not all going to die. In fact, we’ll do quite fine. But it’s always amusing when the OMG, WE’RE SO AFRAID, YOU BE AFRAID, TOO rhetoric of the right-wing runs up against the cold, hard reality of their roadblockin’ ways. Everything’s gonna kill ya, except when it won’t.

I grew up in the Tidewater area of Virginia … hot, humid, muggy in the summer, with some absolutely cataclysmic thunderstorms. You know how you can feel a thunderstorm coming? The air gets crackly, people and animals get a little jumpy, the heat of days starts to wear on people and tempers get short? In Virginia, I could usually tell how big the storm was going to be by how strong that feeling was.

I’m feeling a really huge one coming.

The tension of the last year built higher and higher as the Roadblock Republicans blocked new direction on issue after issue. Tempers flared as we all pushed for solutions to problems. We can see the problems getting worse: a dirty economy that is sliding toward a recession that could be severe, a foreign policy drift that has empowered extremists all over the world, a climate that is warming at an alarming rate … and still the GOP blocks.

This whole thing is going to break, and it’s going to break all over the GOP. I’m on the same side - I’m not going to be in the path of this fury - but I’m a little scared. I make little-child squeaks of fear when I think of it. I huddle under the covers at night when I dream about it. I …

Nah, forget that. I can’t wait.

I want all of this to crash down on the GOP like that 200 foot wave smashing George Clooney’s boat in The Perfect Storm. I’m not scared … I’m gonna enjoy watching Mitch McConnell look at the election returns with a sour look plastered on his face (wait … how will we know it from him normal look?). I’m gonna break open a bottle of bubbly, march over to John Kerry, and give the big guy a hug and a smooch on the cheek.

But what I really dread is the next 10 months before that happens. The right-wing is filled with billionaires who don’t want to go quietly. One group alone - Freedom’s Watch - threatens to spend a quarter billion dollars on this election. And, as we all know, outside groups of right-wingers aren’t known for their positive contributions to the national discourse. Give ‘em a quarter-billion and … whew.

So, it’s up to us. They have millions, but we have … us. We need to work extra hard to give to candidates, get active, call and email media figures to make sure our story gets out, etc. There’s nothing magical or glamorous about it, but it can literally change the world.

The storm is us; we need to sweep away the GOP ourselves.

In our continuing effort to help Roadblock Republicans become productive members of society, we would like to offer this bit of career counseling to Maine's Susan Collins. When perusing the help wanted section of the Bangor Daily News on November 5, ignore the ads for security guards. The following video from our friends at TurnMaineBlue.com explains why.

All of our attention is now focused on the exploding Presidential primaries, and with good reason. I’m not going to get into the horse-race analysis of Obama-Clinton-Edwards … I’m even going to resist my inner sarcasm and avoid the train-wreck that is the Republican field. Because this site is about Roadblocks, and clearing those Roadblocks to build a better future for our country.

But I will mention the biggest story in Iowa, and the developing story in NH … turnout. The turnout in these races has been amazing, historic, mind-blowing. Much has been made over Obama’s ability to turnout voters and rightfully so; his campaign has had a breathtaking start. But it’s not just Obama that turned out people in Iowa; the Clinton and Edwards campaign turned out people at levels that probably led them to believe they were going to win. The whole Democratic field has simply crushed all expectations on what’s possible.

You know why, right? Because people are sick and tired of the Roadblock Republicans. No, no, they aren’t saying that phrase (yet), but that’s the feeling of this country. We have heard enough about why we can’t do things, we’ve had enough of the cynicism and obstructionism of the last couple decades of conservative ascendancy. The Roadblocks have held back the tide for too long, but they are about to break apart under the pressure of millions of energized Americans. The Republicans have built their barriers of smears, fear, and voter suppression, but the people are going to storm those walls in 2008.

That big, dissolute elephant sitting in our road is going to be pushed aside. I know it; I can feel it.

And we have a record!!!!!

Last night, the Roadblock Republicans accomplished a feat no ordinary group of obstructionists could have pulled off. No, it takes a special brand of legislator to actually break the Roadblock record in less than half the time of the previous record. Only a group with a near-pathological disregard for the actual health of our democracy, only a group with a single-minded focus on the cynical political strategies of their consultants, only a group with a imperious disdain for the people of the country could’ve pulled off such a feat.

So, congratulations go out to the Roadblock Republicans. They have etched their names in the history books forever.

And let’s just remember what is really being blocked:

A new course in Iraq: BLOCKED

A new energy future: BLOCKED

More health care for kids: BLOCKED

Help for people affected by the mortgage meltdown: BLOCKED

We make fun of the Republicans, and we get snarky about the Republicans, but the cold facts are that their obstruction has real-world consequences. This stuff matters.

But you see, that’s the difference between Republicans and Democrats right there: to Democrats, government and governing is a responsibility, something to be undertaken with care and with an appreciation of the citizens being affected. To Republicans, it’s just a meaningless, cynical game to be exploited for partisan purposes. Partisanship in service of political goals is fine … we practice that here all the time. Partisanship in service of nothing more than an ambition for power and prestige … well, that’s the Roadblock Republicans.

We’ve got to do something about this.

It's bad enough that the Roadblock Republicans sound like broken records -- you remember 'records,' those funny round black things with the little grooves on them like grandma and grandpa used to have way back in the last century, they used to get scratched and they'd get stuck in one spot and just keep repeating the same thing over and over, until you finally couldn't stand it any more and you wanted to jump up and smash them into tiny little pieces?

Yeah, that's how we feel about the RR's, too. "No!" *scritch* "No!" *scritch* "No!" *scritch* "No!" AAAARGGH!!! *smash!*

But not only do they sound like broken records, the RR's keep breaking records. They may claim to be patriots, but they're just plain old partisan political hacks. They may pretend to be following in the footsteps of Nathan Hale, but they're more like a big pile of Nuthin' Hales instead.

Yes, ladies and gents, the venerable Washington Post finally covers the fact that nothing is making it through the Senate. And they covered it as a problem … between House Democrats and Senate Democrats, of course!

What? Did you expect them to cover the most irresponsible, nihilistic legislative strategy in the history of the Republic when they could do a “Democrats fight amongst themselves” story instead?

And on Page 1, no less:

Democrats in each chamber are now blaming their colleagues in the other for the mess in which they find themselves. The predicament caused the majority party yesterday surrender to President Bush on domestic spending levels, drop a cherished renewable-energy mandate and move toward leaving a raft of high-profile legislation, from addressing the mortgage crisis to providing middle-class tax relief, undone or incomplete.

So, just to recap: Senate Republicans break all precedent in a historically cynical and destructive strategy designed to tar Democrats no matter what problems go unsolved and who gets hurt? Not a story. Democrats get frustrated and argue what to do about it? Front page it, baby! And then blame that frustration for the whole mess. Journalism!

OK, I like to say that the Roadblock Republicans love to block, block, block … but even I didn’t know it went this far.

The Republicans are so enamored of blocking bills, they even throw up the Roadblocks to the bills they want. From the NYTimes:

In fact, the Senate Republicans are so accustomed to blocking measures that when the Democrats finally agreed last week to their demands on a bill to repair the alternative minimum tax, the Republicans still objected, briefly blocking the version of the bill that they wanted before scrambling to approve it later.

That’s just plain dumb. Do they even read the bills before they try to block them? Do the Republicans Senators actually go on the floor, or do they hire look-alikes, like a B-level celebrity doing mall openings? “Look, buddy, you look like me well enough, all you have to do is go out there and say, ‘I object.’ It’s easy money for ya. Now, if you need me, I’ll be asleep in my office. Just make sure you get my Southern accent right.”

Heck, at this level of legislative activity, Strom Thurmond could still be Senator. I mean, he’s dead and all, but all they’d need is an aide to stand next to him, occasionally saying, “Senator Thurmond objects.” Or, “Senator Thurmond votes to uphold the filibuster.” How hard would it be?